Monday, June 1, 2009

When traveling by air...

Hello readers!

EB is back from a week out East. She's returned sunburned and refreshed, and full of stuff to bitch about.

Some no-nos I saw while traveling:

  • Bitching and/or making a scene on the plane.

    While seated before take-off, an oh-so-important businessman (in coach) was talking loudly on his phone (of course, my favorite) but then carping loudly about how hot the plane was. "I know we're all trying to cut back and save money, but Jeezus Christ this is ridiculous!" he boomed. He then halted a passing flight attendant, "Hey, could you turn on the air please?"

    Bless her, she explained in a quiet voice why she could not.

  • Not wearing underwear. (This is a no-no no matter where you are: sea, plane, land.)

    The offender in question was a young male seated a few rows ahead of me at a jazz show. He was wearing jeans. He bent over to tie his shoe, and, oh my. I may have been on the East Coast, but I was viewing the Southern Hemisphere.

    I so did not want to see that. People -- male and female, young and old -- please cover up.

  • Talking loudly at 8:00 a.m. on Sunday.

    When at the airport, especially if it's before noon on a Sunday, and you have to yap on your cell phone, please keep your voice low. It's not 1996 anymore, and one no longer needs to shout into one's cell phone in order to be heard.

    Please just consider the others around you for a moment -- do they really care that you took Billy to the beach? Or that you're having that cyst tested on Wednesday? Or that you're going to ask for a silk wrap at your nail appointment? Answer: no. Also, most of us are not awake yet, and your incessant chatter is annoying. Lower your voice and let us finish our coffee. We thank you.