Friday, August 22, 2008

What to Wear to A Wedding

Three years ago, at my own wedding, I was appalled at what some people wore. One woman showed up in a skin-tight, crotch-high minidress; another showed up in a ratty dress from the early 90s (it was faded; she looked pretty horrid, like she just rolled out of bed); and another wore thigh-high come-fuck-me boots.

People, you're at a wedding. Decorum is called for. Our wedding was no princess wedding. It was held at a reception hall, and yet a select few felt it okay to look like they were trolling for sex at 2 a.m. on a Saturday night.

No matter how "casual" the wedding, please show your respect when you dress. Your clothes are one way -- a very loud way, if you will -- you communicate your respect - or lack of it - for the people and places you encounter.

Yahoo has a pretty interesting article on 9 Things You Should Never Wear to a Wedding. Many comment-posters made some stupid comments: "These are basic things that people know." "These are obvious; people already know this." Uh, no, folks, unfortunately, they don't.

What killed me about my guests was they knew better: I've attended weddings with all 3 of these offenders, where they dressed well. Why did they dress like shit for my wedding? My guess is they don't respect the Bitch.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Thank You, Swingtown (Janet)

Ah, how I love Swingtown. Janet easily had the best quote this week: "Some people need to be reminded of their manners."

Yes, Janet, some people do need to be reminded of their manners. Thank you.

(Please enjoy Janet's sparky personality via the clip below. The clip of her snipping at a Male Chauvinist Pig [and reminding him of his manners] is not yet available)

Watch CBS Videos Online

On "thank you," and asking for a sandwich

This week's earlier post about rudeness on the best show ever ("Swingtown") inspired a reader to call me and vent about her pet peeve: rudeness in commercials.

Yes, caller, I have to agree with you.

First off, commercials these days just flat-out suck. They're not creative or engaging, and they're violent and stupid. No wonder kids are desensitized to violence -- it's being shown to them as a given in 30-second increments. Example: a woman is pissed off at her boyfriend, so she shoves his truck down the side of a mountain.

What kills me is these moronic pieces of mini-film making give a "warning" in 2-pt font white text on the screen (in a spot where no one looks) that says, "do not attempt." Many advertisers need to be shot.

Okay, back to my point: my caller hates the commercial where a kid walks into a kitchen and says, "Hey Mom, how about a sandwich?" and 10 seconds later, his rude-ass dad does the exact same thing.

People, the correct phrasing is: "Mom, could I please have a sandwich?" or "May I have a sandwich, please?"

It's called asking politely, folks. "Please" and "thank you" go a long way in this world.

And I'm happy to say, after viewing many of these mind-numbingly stupid commercials, I can't even tell you the brand or product they are pushing.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Thank You, Swingtown

Why does no one on TV -- even in shows that are set in politer times -- ever say "thank you"?

When someone does you a courtesy, the proper response is, "Thank you."

On last week's Swingtown (arguably the best show this summer, probably this year), Tom the Swingin' Neighbor helps Susan load supplies into a car. Mind you, Tom is not going on this trip; he's just lending a helping hand. The scene plays out thusly:

I'll load these into the car. (Picks up bags)

(weak smile)

Really, Susan, you're that deserving of help that you can't thank the guy that helped you?

Yes, I realize I'm getting spun up about fictional characters. But this is how much I love good manners -- that when an effing fake character overlooks them, I get upset.

I've seen episodes of ER in which the doctor will tell a patient something like, "I removed the bullet and stitched up your chest; you'll be able to make it to the prom by 7 pm," to only receive a quiet nod in response.

You know, I've spent weeks in the hospital with ill loved ones, and here's how the conversation usually goes:

We've reviewed the lab results--

Thank you, doctor!

--and everything seems to be normal--

Thank you!

--so we just want to keep her here for another two hours--

Thank you!!!!

--for observation.

Thank you, Doctor. We appreciate your help so much.

And while my tirade against my favorite show may seem silly, I'm sad to report that crap extends to every day.

Raise your hand if you've ever been asked for the time, and after checking your watch and telling the stranger before you the current time, s/he walks off with nary a kind word.

Yeah, I thought so.

When someone lets you into traffic, say "thank you." (polite wave of the hand)
When someone does anything kind for you -- no matter where you are -- say "thank you."

I know of a certain office worker who has demanded help on his late night projects. (demanded. not "asked for.") He never once thanked those who helped him--and, surprise surprise--no one ever stays late to help him anymore.

Back to Swingtown: Later in the same episode, Susan does another pet peeve of mine: she hangs up the phone without saying "goodbye."

Believe it or not, I do have hobbies. blogging about and blasting rude-asses is one of them.

Thank you for reading. Good-bye.

Swingtown PS: Anyone besides me think Laurie needs to be smacked into next week? Tell me in the comments.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Wedding Tips for Brides

Hey Brides, Grooms, Mothers-of-the-Brides, Maids of Honors, etc. --

To Anyone Who is throwing a wedding, paying for a wedding, hosting a shower, reception, etc.:

  1. It is rude to ask for cash -- in any form, in any way, for any occassion (bridal, baby, engagement, graduation--anything).

    Written, verbal, on the invite, in an email--it is rude. Don't do it. Not even in a stupid cutesy poem.

  2. It is crass to register for a honeymoon or new house --don't ask your guests to pay for your home or vacation. Rude, rude, rude.
    • Registering for gifts is allowable. Technically, you're not supposed to put "Janie is registered at ____" on the invite. That said, so many people prefer knowing of a registry these days, so include a separate slip of paper listing the registry in the invite.